8 Secrets to Being Your Best You

January 21, 2018
Shanika | Orchids + Sweet Tea

8 Secrets to Being Your Best You

8 Secrets to Being Your Best You is a guide to making your 2018 and years that follow, the most effective and life-changing. From doing the necessary work that is required to letting go of toxic relationships + environments to making minor tweaks to a healthier lifestyle; all 8 habits and practices are sure to help you be the best version of yourself that you possibly can.

8 Secrets to Being Your Best You

OK, so we all know that we've reached the 3rd week of 2018 and while many of you may not wallow in the entire "New Year, New Me" movement, I chose to create this post as a way to offer a bit of structure to being the best version of you, regardless of the new year.

While none of the following points are a "one size fits all" or a quick remedy or shortcut to the work that it takes to be your best self, I do believe that implementing these steps CAN HELP you along your journey.

It's definitely helping me. However, always remember that this is a journey, therefore, it doesn't happen overnight.

Formerly, I've had to re-access my life, goals, current happiness(or any lack thereof), among other things, and I realized that the ball oftentimes is in our own court.

Yes, things may have happened to us in our pasts (most of which couldn't have been controlled), however, our futures cannot continue to be deemed based on those past events; at least not forever.

At some point, we must to come to a solid truth about the way things are and sometimes that may mean giving ourselves an ultimatum.

You must ask yourself, "am I going to actually be happy or continue to only want to be happy?".

In this lesson, it has taught me that no one can ever make you happy. YOU must make yourself happy and that begins with your Mind. Then your body. And Soul.

They all are intertwines and cannot function solely without the others being just as aligned. So, here are 8 things that you can do to help you begin your journey to a better you:

8 Secrets to Being Your Best You

Do the Work; It's HARD WORK.

Firstly, I will admit that being the best version of yourself TAKES WORK. I'm sorry if this hurts your eyes as you read the screen, but it's true. Haha!

Seriously, It's going to take a lot of work to intentionally be better. Step by step. Day by day. There will be days where you feel a bit overwhelmed and possibly may want to revert back to old ways, thoughts, and/or actions; but you have to keep reminding yourself that you're on a mission to being your best and nothing less.

However, this is the stage where having a great support system helps greatly.

Knowing that you have others cheering you along the way on or even assisting you in the enabling of good behaviors that align with your goals is a great reinforcer. If you don't have that support, no worries! You sometimes have to be your own encourager!

Faith over Fear.

When it comes to walking this new journey to being your best self, it's going to take a lot of faith, not just in God or any other spiritual practice that you follow, but IN YOURSELF. You can't allow any types of fear to keep you stagnant in any way.

This is where you don't worry about the amount of work that it may take, how far ahead you've gone or the amount of time that you have left, what others may say or think; or even the way that you may think or feel in the process.

Failure isn't a bad thing although it feels like it. It's an opportunity to learn and attempt again--wiser and stronger than before.

This is where you must understand that mistakes are temporary and not permanent circumstances unless you choose to let them be.

Get rid of toxic relationships + environments.

My biggest lesson in the months leading up to 2018: Letting go of relationships or environments that aren't conducive to your being better is a MUST!

No questions asked. Being your best version of yourself requires that you decide to be better--sometimes at all costs.

Therefore, if people aren't understanding of your journey and more importantly, if they are only bringing out the negative parts of yourself that you've been working so hard to polish, then it's time to rethink about those you let around you.

I'm learning that people who truly love you--celebrate your wins, offer a hand during your falls, gently corrects you in your wrong, and holds you through everything else in between.

Those who don't fall in either categories, unfortunately, won't aide you in your journey to being a better you. They'll only keep you stuck.


Take time to heal.

Taking the time to heal from things are so important in the process. This is where you accept the things that you cannot change and gain serenity, regardless of the way that the chips may have fallen.

Forgiveness is birthed from healing. Being able to move forward and leave the remnants behind comes from healing.

Therefore, taking whatever time that you may need to heal (and actively heal, not just lying around sad), is a necessary step in the process to being the best you.

Oftentimes, once we are able to fully see our life's story, we begin to understand that certain events had to happen to lead us to this point in our lives.

Nothing is off-key or out of place. No painful event went by without building some sort of resilience for the next level ahead. Trust the process. Trust your healing.

8 Secrets to Being Your Best You

Build a healthier Lifestyle.

Now onto the "body" of things. Getting your mind right and transformed is the foundation of this entire journey, however, working on the physical also matters.

This is where eating a healthy diet (whatever that may be for you) and exercising (even if that means jogging from your house to the store) makes a difference.

Working on the physical also changes your mental, so everything goes hand in hand. According to an article in Huffington Post, physical activity boosts short-term brain function and heightens awareness.

Plus, we are all aware of the chemical reactions that vitamins and nutrients from certain foods causes in a positive way in our bodies. This is why building a healthier lifestyle overall is so important.

For other lifestyle healthy tips, check out: 5 SURPRISING ALL-NATURAL INGREDIENTS TO GREAT SKIN + RECIPES 

Leave your comfort zone.

This probably has you saying, "Huh?". But yes, going out of your comfort zone brings about a few things, but ONE most important: not only does it take away our dependency for stability and security, but it also allows us to see ourselves from a different angle.

Yes, it may be comfortable to always know what to expect or to even know how to best handle the same types of situations, however, if you were to best handle a new situation (one that you've never done before), you'd learn a bit more about yourself and your capabilities.

This in turn, creates more faith over fear and proves that you are able to complete the journey to being your best self after all.

Practice being positive.

This may sound a bit corny for some, but it's a must. Being positive isn't about gathering up a ton of positive words and spewing them out whenever others are around so that you can "appear" to be positive.

Positivity is an action, a way of being, and it can sometimes take a few daily affirmations, reading of books, and creating an entire positive ambiance, in order for you to even begin to feel positive (if you're starting from the opposite side of things).

But don't worry---in time, things will begin to feel like second nature and it will become who you are! That's where you want to be!

However, having the right people and environments around you in this stage is imperative and can be the reminder you need to stay on course.

Cultivate your passion.

Last but not least, cultivating your passion is one of the many things that will bring out the best version of yourself.

Understandably, many of us work jobs that aren't necessarily the best in terms of what we love to do, because we have to pay the bills and make ends meet.

However, cultivating your passion can be something that you do on your days off or in your spare time. It doesn't always have to be your "main thing" unless your living situation allows it, of course!

Plus, your "side thing" can always become your "main thing" in the right time. You just have to do the work, stay focused, keep believing in yourself (even when fear knocks on your door), and work that thing anyway.

What story are you going to continue to write about yourself in 2018? Is it your best version of you?

8 Secrets to Being Your Best You

8 Secrets to Being Your Best You.

8 Secrets to Being Your Best You


Love this Post? SHARE!


Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

  1. I love that you said "that no one can ever make you happy. YOU must make yourself happy". I have to remember this when things get tough!

    • Yes, I have to remind myself of this daily also Krystal! Just know that you'll no longer have to remind yourself of this one day. Wishing you the best with everything! 🙂

  2. Love this! I totally need to focus on getting a healthier lifestyle—I’ve already fallen on the exercise wagon!

    • Haha! Alyssa, I've fallen off myself! It's definitely hard sometimes, but the more that we hold ourselves accountable, the more we'll begin to take the steps to keeping a healthier lifestyle! Wishing you the best of luck! 🙂

    • Yes, indeed Marcie! I'm seeing just how huge it is now! Oftentimes, we don't realize just how much energy they've drained out of us until we're almost fully depleted.

  3. I love your advice of faith over fear! Sometimes the fear can make you question yourself when you should just keep the faith!

    • Yes, I so agree Emily! Thanks so much! We just have to trust ourselves and trust that we are capable of figuring things out, even if we end up making a mistake. It's definitely all about having the faith to keep going! 🙂

  4. This is such a great and powerful post! Thank you for talking about all of these points, because they are so true! I think most people (me included) almost fear to do its best, to grow to full potential because it isn't easy and will take a lot of effort. Yet, I really want to step up my game in so many aspects this year, because I know that it will be worth the work!
    love, elena

    • Thanks so much Elena! Yes, I can admit that I sometimes try to avoid certain aspects of being better because a lot of work is required, however, I've realized that in order to be better you must do better. So, unless settling is comfortable enough, we just have to get uncomfortable and take things one day at a time.